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Post by Nat on Jul 14, 2018 16:52:00 GMT
Oooooh it smelled disgusting in there. The air was practically dripping with the smell of blood, its sheer concentration so overwhelming and the accompanying humidity suffocating, that Tan found it completely useless to even try to cover up his nose with his sleeves. The room wasn't hot by any means, but he found himself starting to sweat due to the humidity - and the fact that he was thoroughly terrified at the prospect of finding anything out of the ordinary.
A few steps in and he got his wish. The floor felt like it was moving against his soles, while sounds of laughter reached his ears from far, far ahead. He squinted; it was too dim to see past a few feet even with Tuck's torch...he remembered his own, then, without taking his eye off the road ahead, passed it to Tuck so he could help light it up as well.
'You'll probably have a better chance running away than trying to kill something with that gun here,' He told Tuck, trying to strike up a conversation to make the walk less daunting. Rude, maybe, but it was true. The cop would have a better chance of staying alive if he actually focused on the staying alive part. 'But, ah, not saying you're dead weight! The case, I mean, it's your case now, isn't it? We beat the monsters, and you find the missing...'
He trailed off. They were standing at a fork, the two passageways looking...exactly the same. Not helpful.
'Did either of you catch where the noises were coming from? Was it...more to the right, maybe?' He raised his voice and poked his head down the passage on the right. 'Hellooo?'
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Post by RockyRaccoon on Jul 15, 2018 3:08:45 GMT
As Kyu and the rest of his group made their way down the steps he continued to wonder what this Pope guy’s purpose was in kidnapping Gabriela and the other victims was and as he pondered this thought he couldn’t help but feel a mix of anger, excitement and thrilled at the prospect of stopping his plans once and for all. However, Tuck on the other hand seemed to be far less optimistic about their chances and although he understood where he was coming from he still couldn’t help but disagree with him. “I’m sorry Tuck, I really am. Merle was a good man and he didn’t deserve to go out the way he did.” He thought about the moment in which he couldn’t save Merle as well as the moment he watched him being snatched away by that horrid creature that they couldn’t stop. “But that’s exactly why we’re going to stop him! I don’t care what kind of power his stand has! I’m gonna do whatever it takes to stop him and when I do I’ll make damn sure he’ll get exactly what was coming to him for Merle and all the other victims that this monster has attacked!”
It wasn’t until they came at a fork in their path leading the group to decide amongst themselves on where to go from there “I’m not sure…I also don’t think that it’d be a good idea for us to split up but I think it came from the right?…” He said questionably as he walked towards the right side of the path but turned back towards the group in case anyone else had any better ideas.
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Post by killeroftheminge on Jul 15, 2018 5:05:39 GMT
"Yeah, well...she wasn't always like that," Gabriela says, walking alongside Max as the two made their way down the hall. Every squeak from the floor below followed them as they searched for the exit, mirroring their tentative steps with an accompanying squelch.
"Holly is...hard to explain. This place seems to do something to people...not at first, but slowly you start to become...different. Holly was just another girl like me, from what I could gather, but the longer I stayed down here, the worse she became..."
Gabriela seemed flustered the more she talked, looking down at her feet while straightening her skirt. "Anyway, I've been down here for a week, and I haven't found the tower. I only know someone who did, but she came back to get me...and...well, she's gone..."
What did she mean? Did Holly kill her? Did those things? Gabriela hadn't mentioned the strange mole creatures, did she even know they existed? "Quiet you fools!" Tuck says, covering both of the men's mouths with his clammy and salt covered hands. "If something is laughing down here, then I don't want to meet it! Especially if it's anything like that thing on that beach..."
Tuck inches forward, dragging the two men with him, looking around the corner of the right passageway. Indeed, the trio could hear something moving deep within, a deep rumbling from within the darkness.
"Ooooh, is that someone new?"
"More little boys to chase?"
"Delicious, tasty boys..."
"I HOPE THEY DON'T MIND THE SMELL..."
Okay, something definitely knew they were there, but what was more, the smell from earlier began to flow forth, but much saltier than before. So salty... The creatures continued crawling along the ceiling, one or two falling down into the abyss below after losing their footing. The others on the ground tried their best to jump across, several stabbing themselves upon the broken metal of Johnny's handiwork while others simply bounced off the others bodies. More and more of the mole creatures fell to the ground below, flailing wildly as they tried to swim back to the metal cage housing the two boys.
Johnny's suffering had reached its peak. What kind of life was this, fighting against mole people and demon ladies? It was bad enough the group was dealing with some party rocking fool, but now they had this weird Monster House TM thing as well. Why? Why was he always thrown into situations like this?! Did he truly deserve this? Was there some God that rested above that truly hated his very guts?
Johnny was knocked out of his thoughts as he remembered his current predicament. A few of the creatures impaled on the edges of the floor grasped at his ankles, feebly grazing his skin before going limp and falling into the recesses below. They had all assumed that these things were falling into a pit of nothingness, some dark pit of despair in which all existence ceased. A black pit that threatened to swallow them up and subjugate them to the horrors that came with emptiness. A pit that sought to dev-
But to their surprise, there was more beneath. There was something within, as from within the dark embrace of the world below, there rose something pallid and long, eternal and fresh all at once. A freshly born denizen of some bygone era. Two long arms rose from beneath, yellowed nails digging through the very flesh of its fingertips, oozing dark blood as they sought to grasp the very grating that the two boys hung from. Everyone within the maze could feel the vibrations, nearly being floored as the maze was gripped by this eternal thing. From below, only Johnny and Ezack could witness the terror rising to the surface, though the rest could feel its warm breath curling about them. Pink eyes swam within bloated sockets, jagged teeth rattled within the stretched out jaws as the beast from the deep pulled itself up, a mass of pulsating and oozing flesh waiting to pluck both boys from their perch and to place them gently on its little tongue before gnashing them against its yellowed fangs.
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Post by rainbow on Jul 15, 2018 9:35:24 GMT
Once more Ezack was tossed around by Johnny like a midget in a Circus act, the man had made an awful habit of his to simply pick up and throw the little baby boy though there wasn't much he could complain about seeing as Johnny had just tossed the boy to safety and all. Ezack Sat idly by, for a couple of minutes he literally did nothing, Johnny would watch as the child simply stood up top of the steep wall he was climbing looking off into the abyss.
It'd take a little bit but finally Ezackiel's eyes began tracing down towards Johnny, suddenly widening with horror as if they had seen two whole ghosts, were the shark boy to look down under himself he'd see what scared Ezack so; Another nightmarishly large creature awaited both of the stand users at the bottom of the unpenetrable Dark, this one they hadn't seen before but it was by Far the spookiest one.
The boy turned around, they were about to turn tail and leave Johnny to deal with all of this by himself before his conscience weighted on him... Or at least that is how the kid would like to describe the way it happened, in reality Ezack was too scared to face whatever lied ahead by himself, he had already reached his breaking point, if things continued as they were Ezack would go insane.
Quickly removing his pants over his shoes the boy who used to only be shirtless was now half nude, only their undies serving to hide their shame. The reason for this clear display of criminal tendencies and general disregard for the public was all to help Johnny, laying close to the edge of the bridge-sloop Ezackiel would hoist their pants down, using his stand to extend the pant and give Johnny a hand. "Grab it Johnny! Though try not to get cut, it's sharpened."
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Post by dad on Jul 15, 2018 18:23:31 GMT
Johnny shivered, relenting to look down before he eventually gave in and did so. A nightmarish creature, far more imposing, gigantic and powerful than the rest, was climbing the wall. It was probably after Johnny, since Ezack was already in a safe spot. "Fuck, fuck, fuck!" The boy thought as he kept climbing in a panic. It was then, when he was almost at the top, that he saw Ezack take off his pants and almost flash him with his ridiculous undies. "Argh, what the fuck are you doing, you retard?" Johnny spouted, only to see Ezack roll up his clothing and use it to extend his range and help raise Johnny up.
"Ha, finally you do something useful!" Johnny smirked, grabbing the pants and clenching them tightly. However, he suddenly noticed a strange order. He sniffed the air around him, his face turning pale upon realizing what the stench around him was. He then sniffed the area around his hand and suddenly let go! Johnny fell into the abyss, right on top of the nightmare creatures as he screamed "AH FUCK THIS SHIT SMELLS LIKE DRIED CUM!" He yelled before collapsing on a beast and being rubbed off.
"Ugh..." Johnny grunted, now being in an enemy's mine as he was surrounded by numerous monsters. "Y-You want a piece of me?" He shouted, rattling in fear at the sight of demonic creatures ready to assail him.
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PSIchotic
Hamon User
aw jeez scoob
Posts: 201
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Post by PSIchotic on Jul 15, 2018 20:16:47 GMT
The girl was being vague. Max didn’t like that. At all. She said that the place began to do things to people the longer they stayed. If that were the case, wouldn’t she be a possible enemy? She could change like Holly and attack Max. It only meant that they needed to move faster. Max, keeping with his blunt manner, pressed Gabriela harder for information as they walked along.
“Gone? Dead or disappeared? I’m surprised you haven’t died of dehydration yet.”
Max reached into his pocket to summon a photo without drawing suspicion. The corpse he had captured. A completely dark photo, save for the corpse. He outstretched his arm, an unspoken sign for Gabriela to take and look at the photograph.
“You seen any of them?”
Once she took the photo, Max scrambled down notes at what she’d told him regarding her friend and Holly.
“I’ll need you to be specific in your answers, dear. The more I know about this place, the better our chances of getting out.”
His manner of speaking was odd. Southern, but lacking any of the usual kindness. That’s simply how Max was when he worked.
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Post by RockyRaccoon on Jul 17, 2018 16:13:22 GMT
Kyu and his group had continued to make their way down the corridor when suddenly more voices began to pop out of nowhere followed by the the strong scent of salt among other strange scents, an he got back off the ground and looked around his surroundings to make sure the voices weren't coming from anywhere nearby. "What the hell is that anyways?" He pondered but nonetheless he didn't want to take any chances and he immediately summoned Sukiyaki to his steed in case things got even more troublesome. "Let's keep moving, and if something comes up we'll just have to fight it like always but for now we should stick together just in case...Although I'm sure you already know that anyways" He said as he made his way down the corridor intending to get rid of whatever voices were haunting them. "I'm not scared of any of these damn ghosts! I just want to save everyone already!"
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Post by Nat on Jul 17, 2018 17:27:37 GMT
‘Blegh.’ Tan staggered back and pulled Tuck’s less-than-savory hand away from his face. ‘Don’t worry, even if it’s something we can’t fight, I’m sure we can hold it off long enough to escape…’
He had to stop talking. The air was so dense with that salty smell it actually made it a chore to breath. Was there a salted pig feet factory down the path? It could almost give Tuck’s salty palms a run for their money. Tan frowned, but kept walking. He held up his own torch so he could light up the way a little bit further, fully aware that the flame served as a bacon for whatever would come crawling forth.
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Post by killeroftheminge on Jul 18, 2018 3:43:40 GMT
"Save everyone?"
"Ooooooh, would you listen to him? Looks like someone thinks he's a hero..."
"Would a hero let their sister die? Huh?"
Out from the darkness, they could hear it. Even as Tuck shoved his own sausage link fingees into his ears, he couldn't get the sound out of his head. The terrible squeaking, each more shrill and piercing than the last. They could see the pallid glow of something within as it pulled itself forth, gangly limbs reaching dragging along the grated floor, withered and pruned hands shuddering as they tried to grasp onto something within reach. And then the faces.
Terrible visages peeped forth from the shadows, laughing wildly while others howled with tears. Their yellowed teeth gnashed as they came into view, hungry to tear into the salty boys and lick their salty tears from their salted faces.
"Ohhh, Kyu, Onee-chan, I miss you so much. You know I always think about how...how..." one of the faces squeals, grinning madly to itself as it blushes a deep red. Tuck, terrified, tries reaching for his gun, only to find nothing but salt as he reaches into his pockets. What the...was this a stand ability?! The power of salt?! In his confusion, the officer slipped on a pile of the seasoning as it began pouring from his pockets. He slips and slides but he can't get his grip, the man pulling Tan down with him as the two begin sinking into an ever deepening pool of salty waves.
"Ay yo, don't be salty, bro!" One of the heads says, before bursting into a fit of laughter, screeching like a hyena as the other heads focus on Kyu. "Don't worry tasty boy, we didn't forget about you..." They say, batting their eyelashes before turning their gaze to the mass of limbs underneath. Each squirms and fidgets before moving out from their gaze. He could hear something sliding forth, from the deep recesses of this things pit...and there it was.
Obelisk in nature, powerful in girth. It couldn't be...but it was...
"Oh onee-chan, i've been so...so infatuated with you. I've hidden those feelings away..." the creature continues to mock, the member slowly sliding forth. He can see every vein pulsating, quivering with untapped energy as it demanded to be appeased, demanded to return to the darkness.
"Onee-chan, I know you feel the same...so please...do me the honor..." The sausage stiffens, it's links swelling with anticipation as its lone eye spots its prey.
"OF BUTT PLAY! DO ME THE HONOR OF BUTT PLAY, ONEE-CHAN!" The voices screech, shaking the foundations of their makeshift prison as the member surges forth, strengthening in resolve and determination to enter into the unseen hole of Kyu Sakamoto!
Meanwhile, Tan couldn't help but notice his own predicament was getting worse and worse. As he sank deeper, both he and Tuck started to roll amongst themselves, the salt filling every orifice. Tears streamed down both of their faces, Tuck's allergies kicking in as he farts in the Chinese boy's face. "Oh g-god, Tan, this is bad news! M-my allergies...I can't control them!" He says, blowing the salt away from the two as Tuck's flatulence rocks them towards the top of the cage, the man shivering in fear from his own unbridled power. "I'm s-sorry, Tan. I didn't mean to get you so, it's just...oh god, salt ruins me!"
"Ay, boi!" One of the heads says, grinning madly as it stretches out to meet the two on top. "Ay yo, I hope ya don't mind the thread dying like this and all, we had some good times and all, but I think it's time to show you your worst fears,"
"W-what are you saying?" Tuck stammers, but it was too late. The beast opens its maw...and out came the banana ducks. Quacking like mad, the fruit avarian's flocked around their sworn enemy, flapping their peel wings madly while smearing Tan's face in delicious pulp. No, not like this! The ducks tried forcing their way into Tan's mouth, threatening to pull him back down into the salt, threatening to stuff it into his wounds and watch him cry while they kicked his ass. Is this the end of Nat Ant Gnat Tan? To die alone and short?! "You don't understand..." Gabriela says, shuffling from one foot to the other as she held her arm gingerly. "It...it tripped her. Do you hear me?! She was helping me escape and that thing...that thing spat up a banana peel like some fucking chimp and just made her slip off the world. To go out like that, like some kind of oaf, I mean...who does that? Surely she should've see-" Of course, Gabriela's haunting story couldn't be continued. She couldn't have known; after all, who could pay attention when being interviewed by the best damn reporter this side of Fallbrook? She couldn't have seen the looming danger as her foot pressed down, finding its footing on the one thing she dreaded most...banana peel.
Deadly banana peel.
Her face twists in horror once she looks down, but it's far too late. She's already slipping away, the banana carrying her away from Max and towards the bottomless pit ahead. What, where did that come from?! Eh, fuck it, a giant cage was dumb anyways. Now holes made it better.
"FUCK, I HATE THIS THREAD!!" Gabriela screams, the darkness opening up and consuming her, pulling her into its inky depths, forced to wait for the eventual redo of 7.2 before dying once more. The never ending cycle of being forced down the rabbit hole by the most devious of all creatures, the mighty banana peel.
A moment of silence passes, Max left with nothing but bitter disappointment and genuine anger at this dumb shit, but then the strangest thing happens. As if in some attempt to try and insert dramatic tension, a hand reaches forward from the depths...and places the banana peel back where it once was. A few more moments pass before the hand reaches forward and nudges the peel closer. It couldn't be...did it want him to slip on it?! All to facilitate some lazy attempt at instilling danger? Without any build up or anticipation?! What kind of hack was this hole?! "No, I want two pieces!" The beast belows, Johnny finally realizing his true predicament. He was on top the very scalp of this elder beast, his gargantuan warts and scraggly hairs like monuments to his absolute disgust and reproach. "But, noone laughs at that, so moving on! Why do you sit on top, boy?! Do you not realize you speak to Binglebong.exe?!" The creature roared, the mole creatures that hung to his folds and nips whooping and hollering at the mere mention of their big boy's name.
"You tell em, boss!"
"You're my hero!"
Humbled by such words, the creature turned its big, beautiful eye back onto Johnny, glowering in discontent at seeing the boy's slippery fingers. "WHAT'S THIS?! Why...it's cream. Fresh cream, my how did you know I love a freshly made pot of cream?!" The creature turns its gaze upward, spying Ezack's pants. Reaching forward, he grips it in his manicured grip, tugging with Ezack before gripping the pants away from the boy's grip and settling it in his own grip.
"Hahahaha, and now the cream machine belongs to me!" The creature tosses the garments into his mouth, leaving Ezack with nothing but his stained underwear and his twisted pride. Of course, one taste was all it took to send the creature into a gagging fit. "This...this isn't cream...no..."
"Boss?"
"What is it, main man?!"
"IT'S CUM!!! IT'S DRIED CUM THAT YOU'VE BOTH FORCED ME TO EAT!!!! DON'T YOU KNOW I HAVE PRIORS?!"
Red hot and steaming with absolute fury, the creature stretched both of its hands out to grab at Johnny and Ezack, it's mighty hands seeking to squeeze the life out of both of them for this act of sexual harassment they had imparted onto him!
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Post by dad on Jul 18, 2018 15:20:27 GMT
"Huh?" Johnny was surprised at the fact that the creature didn't immediately attack him. Instead, it muttered something about cream before slowly drinking up the remains of Ezack's cum. Johnny almost felt like puking in that moment, but the rage of the monster in front of him was enough to snap him out of it. He swiftly dodged a perilous blow, landing in a pile of trash and coming out with an edgy trenchcoat. While his opponent didn't seem very strong, Johnny's body was shivering. The creature wondered if the boy was scared of it, but that wasn't the case. "I'm fed up..." Johnny kept repeating. "I'm fed up with being in shitty threads!" Johnny shouted, his soul doing its best to rebel against the harsh conditions that had been placed on him for 7 chapters. "I've been in 2.1, I've been in 4.1, I've been in fucking 3.1. Do you have any idea of how bad I had it? And now you have the courage to show yourself, a shitty jobber filler villain who's just there to pad out this thread even more?! Heh...I finally understand it now. I've been fooling around ever since this entire thing started, joining the threads with less active dudes in order to help out. I thought that if I could help out, it didn't matter if I was shafted..." He muttered. "But I was wrong. I hunger for it...I thirst for it...To be the main character! Even if I have to surpass the other shitposts in this thread in order to remain relevant, I'll still do it! Step aside, Kyu!" Johnny shouted, suddenly pointing at the floor as a gigantic card hologram now stood on it. "Reversed card, open!" "De-Fusion! It targets one Fusion Monster on the field and returns it to the Extra Deck while allowing me to Special Summon all monsters that were used as Fusion Materials for its Fusion Summon!" Johnny revealed, his Stand now appearing behind him. "And I choose... Quand C'Est!" He declared, his Stand now glowing white and mourning as it started to split into several parts. "This is how I struggle to remain relevant, by spamming Yu-Gi-Oh! references!" He shouted. A flash of light then occurred as Quand C'Est's metamorphosis was now complete. It had split from one giant shark into four smaller sharks. "Jawesome!" The sharks cried out, flexing their muscles as they lunged for the monstrous creature Killer had created, because he couldn't come up with a better paranormal creature cause he's a loser. The Street Sharks proceeded with their vicious onslaught, eating the monster's ass while devouring its comrades. It was so brutal and deranged that it reminded Ezack of that time where he shot his parents and hid their bodies before blaming it on Mothman in a bout of psychotic rage. After the carnage had subdued, Johnny cackled in his edgelord clothes as he sifted through the trash, finding a photo of a happy couple. "THIS COULD HAVE BEEN US, JOAN! BUT YOU FRIENDZONED ME TEN TIMES TEN FUCKING TIMES FOR DUMBASS KYU THUNDERCOCK!!! WHEN WILL YOU LEARN TO LOVE ME, A GENTLEMAN STREET SHARK INSTEAD OF GOING AFTER DUMB CHADS?? BITCH, EDGELORDS RISE UP!!!" Johnny shouted, the edgelords indeed rising up as Abel from Earth and Abel from Mars appeared in front of him, ready to obey his commands. "THIS MEME WAS MADE BY GANG DOLCE." Mars Abel spouted. "WE LIVE IN A SMALL TOWN THAT SOMEHOW HAS 3 BILLION PEOPLE LIVING IN IT!" Earth Abel revealed. "...Finally, now that I have obtained a power that rivals the Gods, it is time for me to get revenge on CHAD!" Johnny declared, starting to leave the place. "Kyu will learn.... not to mess with a gamer."
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Post by rainbow on Jul 18, 2018 16:06:03 GMT
Johnny had become more powerful than Ezack could ever have hoped for, the man had acquired four weaker versions of quand incest (kyu's favourite stand) and had recruited all of Abel's counterparts, it was truly a sight to behold. But even still; Ezackiel was fucking disgusted.
Clenching his fists the kid fell down the hole where Johnny was at, pointing at him with his naked ass finger. "You disgust me Johnny! Is this it huh? Are you really going to do this? Forgetting about your roots just to appeal to the masses and make funny Yu-Gi-Oh references? You're... You're a fucking bozo!"
That's when it clicked, Ezackiel's anger was overflowing inside his tiny nude body, he was pushed to his limits in this shitty thread and had acquired a brand New transformation, Ezack had achieved the status of a legendary super jobber.
"Hah... Haaa..... AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!"
Ezack started to change, from the Skinny boy he used to be they slowly transformed into a big buff naked man, his hair turning towards a white tone like he used to have before Rainbow changed It because he realised How fucking stupid It was, this was Ezack at his most powerful but they were also their least sane. With a much manlier Voice the kid flew into the Air and put both of his hands up.
"THIS IS IT JOHNNY! ILL END YOUR TREND RIDING SHITPOSTS ONCE AND FOR ALL!
Jobbers of the earth, please listen carefully. As you know your threads have been turned into shitposts at the hand of Johnny the JoJo ,unfortunately Johnny is still Alive and the forum is still in danger, i have decided to fight on your behalf but to do so i'll need your help. That is why if you could all raise your hands into the Air and give a portion of your energy to me you could help me defeat Johnny. No more joining shitty threads and being left in the shadow by chads like Grant or Kyu. Now lets Begin, raise your hands up now!"
Kitty who had been working at her brothel would hear Ezack's voice, lifting both of her hands up into the Air. ''Take It Ezack! Get rid of this main character wanna be once and for all!"
Monks, the token Black man who was robbing another convenience store and checking for whitebreads would also lift his hands up. "Yo hol' up, im not the MC?"
In a desolate corner of the planet Mars, Simon was busy being a beta like he is but even still he would hear Ezack's words and would Share some of his energy. "YAAAAS, TAKE IT EZACK GO SLAY QUEEN!"
And with that the Spirit bomb was almost complete, It would only take a few more Episodes before Johnny was slayed like the loser he is.
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Post by Nat on Jul 18, 2018 17:48:00 GMT
'Oh my fucking god officer Tuck, sir, we just talked about how you're not supposed to be pulling new settings out of your ass just to suit the writer's fancy, not to mention this one of yours absolutely reeks just like all the other trash-tier settings we've scrapped on the forum and pretended never existed!' Tan furiously wipes the salt off of his tear streaked face but is immediately ambushed by a horde of flying banana ducks! To hell with those things! It's one thing watching Mike eat those things like they are actually edible and nutritious because he gets it, Dad just likes pushing his weird banana fetish onto his written characters and living his banana fantasies vicariously through a weeb roleplay, but it's a whole other deal to have the DM force it onto you when you have clearly expressed both in and out of character that bananas are the fruits of the devil and should be all burned to a crisp. This isn't just some petty shitpost anymore. No.Some bigger power must be at play here, and Tan vows to bring them out to light and take them out if it's the last thing he does!!!!!!!!!!! (<-there should be 11 exclamation marks here to fully express his contempt)
' Hmph,甘い!' (T/N: it means soft and naive) Tan scoffs, spitting out the banana ducks that managed to get inside his mouth and summons Solidarity Breaks, casually flicking away the rest that still haven't given up on violating his face while he wags his finger at the swarm. 'I get it. I get it. Just like how I'm suddenly fluent in Japanese to throw you off, you are just using this pointless and harmless attack in hopes to overwhelm me, to ensure that I am distracted from the impending doom of this whole thread. A good try, I'll give you credit for that. However!' Tan smirks at the strike-through texts, a remnant from the true mastermind behind this clusterfuck of a shitpost. 'You can derail the thread, but that doesn't hide the fact that it will forever remain a third rate thread with fourth rate salty dicks, I mean what the fuck is up with that?!' On the ground and begging for the attention of the viewership is a pile of unspoken evil that must be purged in order to salvage a thread sunk to its lowest of lows. Tan sighs, frowning as he musters up all the power within himself and channels them to his Stand. 'Solidarity Breaks let's go!' The Stand rips through the banana ducks like nothing and lands right next to the monstrosity. In its left hand is a banana duck, and in its right hand a flaming torch. 'Take this! JUDGEMENT KNIGHTS OF THUNDER!!!' Tan shouts, kicking in the air as Solidarity Breaks pounds the banana into the monster dicku, turning it into one big soft banana before bringing down the torch, smashing and shredding through it like a silver whirlwind until the dicku was no more than a flurry of disgusting banana goop, purifying his part of the scene for the underage viewers once and for all. Tan is so into the action that he almost misses that mop of white hair, but thanks to his 20/20 vision, he manages to stop his Stand before he started hitting it as well. What the hell is that? He inner monologues, squinting his eyes in the dim light until he makes out the shape of none other than...Kyu! 'Oh...Kyu! You were here all along?' He wondered out loud as he slides down the salt pile.
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Post by dad on Jul 18, 2018 18:19:52 GMT
"Heh..." Johnny just laughed, because all edgy dudes in anime just do a cocky laugh anytime someone opposes them so he had to respect that trend as well. "Oh, so you think you're oppressed? Bitch, I'm not even allowed to be racist anymore and it's the 50s! I can't call Monks and Adeline the dumb niggers that they are because for some reason the entire SM cast is fine with blacks and chinks running about for no reason! Clearly I am the true victim here." Johnny said powerful words. Ezack's will would waver a bit as he started reflecting on his wise statement.
The energy of the Spirit Bomb was immense and it would have definitely vaporized Johnny. However, this also meant that Ezack was now standing in one place, waiting for his move to be fully charged. "Listen up, Ezack. I'm a gamer, not because I have no life.....but because I hate women and minorities." Johnny gave off an edgy deranged grin. Ezack started to ponder what he meant, before he heard loud footsteps and ranting behind him. He turned around and saw a swarm of women and minorities, all of them with pitchforks and signs in hand as they rushed for Johnny. Of course, Johnny was the ultimate gamer! Therefore, literally everyone in the world hated him. Ezack was between the two...Meaning that he would be trampled!
"Begone, you runt!" Johnny finger gunned Ezack before slowly walking away like an emo as Abel 1 and Abel 2 followed suit. Ezack would have no choice but to fight off the horde of people that had been oppressed by gamers worldwide.
Tan, Kyu and Tuck were surprised as some random dude in an edgy black trenchcoat appeared in front of them along with two Abels. The face, however, gave the person's identity away: It was Johnny!
"Kyu, it's time for you to pay! We live in a society where Chad can fuck his own sister while us gamers can't even fuck our Veronicas and Joans?? This is disgusting, BOTTOM TEXT!" Johnny spouted. "Don't piss me off, you fool! I'm close to LEVELING and you look like just enough EXP if you catch my drift!" He declared. It was clear that Johnny would block the group's path until he had his revenge.
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PSIchotic
Hamon User
aw jeez scoob
Posts: 201
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Post by PSIchotic on Jul 18, 2018 18:38:44 GMT
No. This couldn’t be possible. Max could deal with the death of the girl. But this, this thing in front of him. He was supposed to be dead. Max watched him die. Painful memories flooded into Max’s mind, shown in the form of a retarded flashback that readers should most certainly just scroll past.
World War One was just a ruse. A cover up for the real war. The Archduke wasn’t shot, he wasn’t even in a car at the time. He slipped on a banana peel, a bioweapon created by the Germans to take over the world. While nations went to war, the true cause was never publicly known. Photographs were staged. Interviews were made, all to shield the public from the horror of that yellow menace. Max remembered his final mission before they removed him from combat service for severe mental trauma. They’d managed to get past the banana tanks and peel infantry, but now they had to take down the head honcho. The Big Split, they called him. Max and Major Dong were a two-man army that stormed the banana headquarters like a bunch of goddamn chads when they met their match. The Big Split sat before them, dual wielding RPGs and monologuing about world domination and how peels would rise up when Major Dong shot the first shot from his legendary coconut gun. Max could only watch in awe as his friend, wearing but a tie, fought the menace. In the end, both were wounded and bleeding, but a peel like the Big Split could only be killed by one thing: stepping on him. Major Dong, the leader of the bunch Max knew so well, asked Max for one final favor before he made the ultimate sacrifice. He asked him to call him “DK” one last time. An old college nickname. Max couldn’t deny the poor ape his last request, but as he opened his mouth Major Dong fully e x p a n d e d himself and stepped on the Big Split. Both the Major and the Big Split died that day, or so Max thought. But this world of nightmares had somehow known Max’s greatest fear and placed it in front of him, or at the very least a startlingly accurate lookalike.
Max smoked another cigarette from the seemingly infinite amount he had, and decided to brave his destiny. He turned around, putting his camera up and making a peace sign with his free hand as he invented the selfie, then turned back. Flicking the cigarette away, Max tried his best to drop the sickest one liner he could.
“Sun Tzu, while on his journey to discover America in 1776 with Albert Einstein, said that Rick and Morty was a show for intellectuals. What a wise man he was.”
Max accepted the new Big Split’s challenge and stepped on the peel, letting fate decide what would become of the both of them as 40 American flags appeared behind him and a bald eagle let out a mighty screech. Max could hear Major Dong singing to him as he followed in his footsteps as he made his best attempt to get into another WatchMojo comp for saddest anime moments.
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Post by killeroftheminge on Jul 18, 2018 20:19:47 GMT
"Ah, lookie here! It appears the Gamer has finally surfaced..." A voice booms all around Kyu and his side kicks, rattling their Hell in a Cell to the screams of gamer girls in the stands around them. The banana dick, now nothing but a molten mess, bubbled and boiled beneath the Kyu Crew's feet. Holly was at a loss, the beast unsure of what could burst forth from her melted loins while Tuck simply shivered and BRAAAAPed in silence. From the molten pulp a shape emerged, human in nature as it licked the delectable creme brulee from their fingers. Pope?! He has returned...
"Well, it looks like short round figured it out (you get that, I'm wacky cause I reference memes!)" Each flap of Popes banana lips sent pudding flying all over the group, recoiling from the terrible muck. "He's broken through the charade and seen the world for what it is. Of course Johnny would know all about charades; he's been pretending to have a character for 7 chapters now!"
Pope takes one look at Holly, eyeing the terrible beast with a cocked brow before thrusting his hips in her direction. With a cry, the beast blew apart, it's Life Points reduced to zero or however the hell that baby game works. "Begone Evil Within reject! Back to the spike gamer awards! But seriously, I'm sorry I had to do it to em, but sometimes it just be like that. You see, you all could feel it couldn't you? The deaths no one cared about, the sudden new stand users that talk about their powers for no reason. The plot threads that drop, the painter that just appears and disappears. It was hidden well before, but this was the final straw, when this completely original and unique setting was ruined! But I guess my cards are on the table. You see, I'm more than just a spooky ghost. I'm a killer. A killer of minge."
A huge influx of power erupted from all around, Pope's body glowing a fierce gold as he snaps his fingers. "Its time to drop these gamers in my cringe collection," he says, smirking as the crowd around him goes FUCKING wild. Two new challengers manifest by his side: Jack, scourge of RPs, and Derek the Derailer.
Unfortunately, Derek and Jack had awakened an ancient warrior: Grant, the Matchless Poet! He quickly arrived from the shadows, humming "Rap God" by Eminem as he quickly took out his book and bonked Jack on the head with it, knocking him out instantly. Derek squealed upon seeing the prolific writer in front of him.
"OMG!!! I LOVE YOUR BOOKS, MAN!!! Could you give me an autograph?? Please!" Derek begged, kneeling in front of Grant. Of course, Grant was a kind soul, so he obliged and wrote his autograph on a book before bonking Derek on the head with it too.
Since his work was done, Grant then disappeared, having returned to 7.1 to beat up Marty and Abel.
The crazed women and minorities claw at Ezack's buff CHAD body, leaving red stinging marks behind...The marks of WIMPS taking in too much soy!
Unfortunately, their numbers were enough to hold the raging ball of pectorals in place, the spirit bomb (genkidama is much better desu) only growing larger and larger as more souls were trapped within. This boy with the dream of becoming the OC could feel his relevance slipping away. Johnny was growing too powerful, his street sharks for sure to bump him up a few places on the popularity poll, placing him in the coveted 67th percentile. No...NO. He would not go the route of Degree, or Dandy before him! Ezack was important godamn it! He was real, realer than the rest of these fools...
From within the spirit bomb, life stirred. Born of Ezacks potential and frustrations, a past voice echoed in his ears.
"Don't let yourself fade, my boy! I was beaten out of notoriety by a pink haired midget and a broccoli cuck! Stand up to the gamers, show him the power of respecting others and their differences! Down with Trump, and down with Johnny!" A voice he knew, yet couldn't quite place. But he could sense the truth in those words. He might have failed, but he implored Ezack to continue on, to thrive. TO RISE IN THE RANKS AND BE WORTHY OF SHIPPING!
Who could have expected his nightmares to return like this....
He thought he was done, out of the game, but these mothafuckas keep dragging him back in, keep daring this real dude to E X P A N D.
Well, E X P A N D he did, the man brimming with American power as he flashes the darkness of 7.2 with his cry for justice. Down with the yellow menace and down with this crumbling thread. It was time to make a statement, about respecting women and paying homage to our chimp ancestors.
The pit beneath cowers in fear, patriotism causing it to get BTFO as the darkness seeps away. All around Paradise, the dark void fades and reveals the truth...
Locked in a room. That's all this was, the group stuck behind some chained door while they floated endlessly amidst their cage. Was this it?! The world couldn't only be this, some poor attempt at plagiarism?!
"Your eyes aren't wrong my boy. No matter how much I denied it, it was all a ploy. They wanted a ghost thread and I gave em a room. It's a crying shame," Max whirls around, the movement killing his bald eagle immediately and sending it tumbling to the floor beneath. "Oh shit, dawg, now I'll never see season 4 of Rick and Morty, wubbalubbadu-" it's cries were cut off as it slammed into the floor below, it's form taken by the moloids, ready to appease their leaking crotches with the symbol of democracy.
"I guess that just be how it do sometimes," a man says, shaking his head while he pours one out for all the eagles. Who could this be?!
"I'm killeroftheminge, and welcome to Silent Hill 4: The Room."
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